You say, to start with, you have laryngitis;
Stop right there, Maximus, and you'll delight us.

An Answer to the Parson
by William Blake

"Why of the sheep do you not learn peace?"
"Because I don't want you to shear my fleece."

Your uphill climb will never stop;
scum always rises to the top.

To Someone Who Insisted I Look Up Someone
By X.J. Kennedy

I rang them up while touring Timbuctoo,
Those bosom chums to whom you're known as Who?

Ahead
by Bruce Bennett

Trapped in a tunnel, I detect a strain
of faintest light. You tell me it's a train.

Good things come to those who wait.
That's why I procrastinate.

Paula wants to marry me;
I won't, I've often told her.
She's an old woman, but I might,
If she were only older.

They probe my mind,
  They poke and pry,
But ah! They do not know
  I lie!

The goose that laid the golden egg
Died looking up its crotch
To find out how its sphincter worked.

Would you lay well? Don't watch.